Are you a leader? Powerful questions to ponder
Some years ago, my local church pastor said, “If you think you are a leader, turn around and check to see if anyone is following you.” I’m sure that he was thinking that if no one is following, then there is no one leading. But I’m not so sure that this is a good way to think about leadership.
In order to explain why, I’ll have to define both the words “leader” and “follower”.
I’ll define a “leader” as one who has a personal charisma that is attractive and beneficial to another and is able to draw that other one into his world view, thereby encouraging certain behaviors in the follower.
This leader is different from someone like a company CEO. A CEO encourages loyalty to a company and to company policy, not to himself as an individual. His relationship to his company employees need not be personal. So he may be called a servant leader to his team or he may count himself as one of the team.
A true leader, I think, is one who wants and expects his followers to have a personal connection with him, much like a father/son or mother/daughter relationship.
This can be one of the best and most helpful relationships or it may be very destructive to both leader and follower, depending on leadership style.
A follower then, is a person who makes a personal connection with someone who has drawn him into a particular world view or into the working out of a particular mission. He is a disciple or an apprentice. A follower has become willing to change and manage his own life to accommodate that of the leader.
A follower could be a son or daughter, a church member, or (heaven forbid) a cult member. I know of only one very good leader who had 12 disciples/followers.
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A company CEO may have people following his directives even though he may not be a true leader.
So why is this important?
I think it’s Important because I think that it can be dangerous for anyone, even with good intentions, to develop a following. What do you think? Is it ever a good idea to develop a personal following? If we assume that we are intelligent and skilled enough to lead someone in a personal way, we are taking on a very responsible task. The danger, of course, is in leading someone in a wrong direction. An extreme example would be that of a cult leader.
Here are a few questions to ask yourself that could determine if you are a good and appropriate leader or a leader at all:
Does my follower have complete freedom to make a wrong choice?
Does my follower have complete freedom to leave my influence without being shamed?
Am I completely comfortable with leading my follower to follow someone else with more expertise than I?
Can I be comfortable leading as a coach rather than a counselor?
Can I be completely comfortable being part of a group that leads each other?
Do I demand certain behaviors from my follower?
Do I encourage my follower without any strings attached or do I use that encouragement to leverage my follower to further my own agenda.
Do I gain financially from my relationship with my follower?
How much of my personal self should I share with my follower?
Might I lead someone now in a way that I would never lead them at some point in the future? (Theoretical but worth considering)
Might my own leadership style change over the years?
Can I be a follower and a leader at the same time?
And finally, can I be comfortable with leading someone to the only good leader who began with just twelve disciples?
These are mostly very “leading” questions in another sense as well. They are calling out possible very real dangers in leadership style.
So, I guess that all I want to say is that being a true leader is a very responsible job and a true leader can rightfully be held to a very high standard.
Maybe leading by example is a better way. Spread kind truth and be a great friend to a few and a good friend to all. - David F. Ask
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